A: A Kwakfest is, simply, a one-hour General MIDI compo. Compos are timed contests in which musicians, artists, or programmers create the best possible example of their work -- from scratch -- within a given time limit, under a specific set of limitations. The most common compos are hour-long tracked module competitions, where musicians use a composition tool called a tracker to write a song in 60 minutes. Surprisingly, many musicians are quite good at this, and can write several minutes worth of music with time to spare. One-hour music compos are typically referred to as OHCs, and have a long history with many notable participants. Most of the VGMix crew work primarily with MIDI sequencers as opposed to module trackers, so we've adapted the OHC tradition to our working method, noncompetitive spirit, and general rejection of any seriousness at all.

A: One hour is given to write a song in General MIDI format. The song can be in any style or mood, but it must not have existed prior to the start of the competition. You're free to arrange other songs, but unless it's a very clever arrangement, you'll impress people more by writing original music. We don't generally allow an entry to require any custom instrument samples such as non-GM Soundfonts; the song must play back on any GMIDI-capable soundcard. Almost all consumer soundcards include an on-board synthesizer (software GMIDI synth plugins are available as well) with a generic set of instrument sounds that follow the GMIDI specification. While the instruments sound different between manufacturers, the instrument numbers are the same -- so, for instance, a nylon guitar part will be played with a nylon guitar sound, because the number for nylon guitar is 024 on any GMIDI synth.

A: A .mid file (or "sequence") is a very compact set of musical instructions. It is to your soundcard what a printed score is to an orchestra -- instructions for which notes each instrument must play, when, how loud, and so on. The file itself doesn't contain any actual audio recordings, simply the directions for the synthesizer to play them with its own sounds. Thus, there is no mixing or audio production to be done, leaving only the composition. Over time GMIDI composers develop a sense for which instruments are "safest" to use in that they vary the least between manufacturers, and a skill for using layering and creative arrangement to make the most of the often tinny sound of GMIDI synths. Despite what you're used to hearing embedded on webpages, even the chintziest soundcard will sound good in an expert's hands.

As to why we don't use modules or other formats: Because we don't. If you want a MOD OHC, join or host one! There are plenty, and they're fun too! But this is GMIDI, and we assure you that mindblowingly good music is produced.

A: There are a variety of tools you can use. Some popular commercial ones include Cakewalk Sonar, Cubase, Finale, Digital Performer, and Logic. Many nontraditional tools have "MIDI Export" capabilities, such as Reason, FL Studio, and even the free MODPlug Tracker. There are many other programs available for writing GMIDI, many of them free and/or open source. A Google search for "Free MIDI Sequencer" (try with and without quotes) is a good start.

A: An announcement is made several hours before the Kwakfest is to start in the #vgmix IRC channel. About half an hour before the starting time, people start joining #kwakfest and talking. When the starting time arrives, someone will make it apparent in a bold, colored, otherwise ridiculous fashion and the entrants will start working. An hour later, the deadline will be announced and the songs are uploaded through a webpage form. They will be zipped and then made available for everyone to download.

Once everyone has downloaded the songs, they are played in alphabetical order. Whoever is in charge will tell you to queue a song in your player of choice, and then tell everyone to begin playing at the same time. Why? Because it's a lot more hilarious that way. Once all the songs have been played, a "winner" (usually the funniest song) may or may not be declared, and everyone will stick around and chat for a while.

It's important to note that there is no actual competition and no voting. We do this for fun, not to compare talents or proficiency. We're all at completely different levels compositionally and technically, and it ruins the fun to determine voting criteria and rank people qualitatively. (Coming from a veteran of over 100 OHCs!)

A: Kwakfest is held in #kwakfest on the irc.vgmix.com network. While you're there, check out #vgmix, where most of the Kwakfest regulars hang out.

A: You're welcome to be a spectator. However, you'd better have a good reason for not learning how to sequence (lack of talent is not a good reason, nor is lacking speakers or hands or a computer.) Seriously, people of ALL skill levels write songs, and even the insane mutants who write 5 minute songs are still learning continuously. Don't be afraid to join in!

A: Typically, they've been held whenever anyone felt like it and could get at least one or two other people to join in. Now, though, they're more organized. Check the main Kwakfest page for the date and time of the next one.